Adaptive coping strategies for nervous system regulation
Nervous system regulation is crucial for intuitive living because it allows us to tap into our bodies and act consciously, rather than impulsively. Yet how is it done?
Coping refers to the strategies we use to manage stress, aka regulate our nervous systems. This can be done adaptively or maladaptively. While maladaptive strategies can help regulate our nervous systems just like adaptive coping strategies, they often aren't as long-lasting. Moreover, they tend to bring negative side-effects with them, like discomfort, addiction and disease. Compared to adaptive coping, this makes maladaptive strategies an unsustainable solution.
Developing a repertoire of adaptive coping mechanisms allows us to overcome life's challenges without creating new problems. There are two main ways (Lazarus & Folkman, 1984):
1. Problem-focused coping: Aiming to change the stressful situation itself.
2. Emotion-focused coping: Aiming to manage the emotional distress associated with the situation.
Problem-focused coping
Problem-focused coping is adaptive when the stressor can realistically be alleviated or eliminated through action. Evolutionarily speaking, this is what our fight or flight response is for. In our modern world, this looks like researching necessary information, setting up strategies, managing our time, setting boundaries and practicing brave and authentic communication. The common denominator among these is that all are practical interventions. However, not all problems are solved through action. This is when emotion-focused coping is appropriate.
Emotion-focused coping
Emotion-focused coping is adaptive when the stressor cannot realistically be alleviated or eliminated through action or, even if it could, we might deem it undesirable to do so. For instance, you might find yourself increasingly more triggered by something or someone. Rather than retreating further and further into isolation, thus "eliminating" the perceived problem, you might engage in emotion-focused coping to widen your window of tolerance.
Emotion-focused coping includes practices like mindfulness, cognitive reframing, social support and cathartic activities like going for a walk, listening to music, dancing etc. By changing your perspective and releasing emotional tension, the main goal of these activities (or "non-activities) is to alter your state of mind - nothing might change about your external circumstances, and yet you see the world with different eyes.
Adaptive application
While problem- and emotion-focused coping are considered adaptive strategies, they can turn maladaptive when misapplied. For example, trying to fix an unchangeable situation can cause frustration, while applying emotion-focused coping to real-world problems can result in avoidance or "spiritual bypassing".
Few challenges are overcome solely through outside tinkering or "transcended" entirely through mindset shifts. More often than not, a combination of strategies is warranted. For instance, you might want to look at reducing external triggers while processing your emotions somatically and socially. It's important to consider which forms of coping are appropriate and accessible in your circumstance, make a clear plan, evaluate your efforts and adjust as needed.
